Long discussions
by nife
Summary: Yuan and Kratos have a discussion about what they've been doing in life, and to each other. Yaoi


A one shot, done by yours truly!

Ya, this is a Yuan/Kratos fic. So, you don't like, don't read, k?

Warnings: Just by the earlier warning you should realise that this a Yaoi fic. So you don't like that, then don't read. Also there will be a lemon.

Spoilers: Um, maybe?

Disclaimer: I own nothing

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I should have figured this out earlier. I mean I already knew, but I shouldn't have been caught so…unaware.

I sigh, looking at my metallic prison. I had been in here for about half a day (at least by my calculation as there were no clocks, and no other way to tell the time.) I was in the renegade base because I had been threatened with my son's life if I did not co-operate. As such I had allowed myself to be taken prisoner. Which translated to me being trapped in the renegade's base's prison till I was told to do whatever it is they wanted me to do.

I could probably accurately guess what that was. I sat waiting, not being able to do much else.

I looked up when I heard footsteps. Who I saw was of no surprise.

"Yuan…"

He glared at me. He knew that by doing this he was committing high treason, not that he hadn't been doing so already, but now it was confirmed.

"You look well." He commented off handily.

"As well as anyone taken prisoner." I replied.

He scoffed. "Sarcastic as ever."

"I wouldn't be so _sarcastic_ if the situation would not be as it is." I replied back.

He glared at me once more then shot back, "The situation would not be as so if you had been more co-operative."

"And join the renegades?" I glared back. "I told you that I am not going to follow you around and watch you make your mistakes."

"Why? You don't seem to mind following Mithos, and allowing him to make his." Yuan growled back.

"That is…different." I replied at length. I couldn't really justify my actions to Yuan without revealing what it was I was trying to do by following Yggdrasill.

Yuan scoffed again, it was becoming an annoying noise. "Different? I don't see how, but that is not what I have to talk to you about. I'm giving you one last chance. Join me or parish!" He shouted glaring at me, trying to be as intimidating as possible.

Not that he wasn't, it's just that I had not been intimidated by anything before, and I would not start now.

So I met his glare with one of my own, though less in anger, and more in defiance.

However when I met his eyes I was shocked to see what it was that I saw. Though the anger was apparent, I also saw a silent pleading for me to stop this facade and join him, lest I make him do what it is he knew he'd have to do should I refuse.

My heart stopped for a moment. Here was my friend, whom I had known for a _very_ long time. We had been friends…no even closer, brothers. Defending each other to the last breathe. I knew he didn't want to kill me; he didn't even want to think of it. However he knew that if I did refuse he would be left with no other choice.

And for a moment I wanted to agree, and say, 'Yes Yuan, I will join you and fight along your side to defeat Mithos.' But we both knew that is not what I would say, that I couldn't, even if it meant the end of our friendship, and possibly my life.

He looked away. "Is that you're final answer?" He asked, and though I hadn't voiced it, he knew the answer to this question as well.

"Yes Yuan, I will not join you… I can not…"

He sighed. "I know… though I kept praying that perhaps…you would." I could hear the grief in his voice, and I wanted to comfort him, as I had in the past.

He opened the cage I was in, and without meeting my eyes, bid me to follow him.

I did so without resisting. I followed him to his office where he motioned for me to sit. I did so, and he moved to the other side of his desk, sitting in his own chair.

Once we were both properly seated he spoke. "You know what this means."

I nodded. "I do."

"You're son may also suffer for your decision." He said without looking at me.

I glared at him then shouted, "Yuan, you will not harm him!"

He finally looked at me. "I will not, but you will." He said calmly.

I glared at him; knowing what he was referring to. My son…did not know who it is I was. That the traitor who had nearly killed him and caused his friends endless suffering was none other than his own father. I felt shame hot on my cheeks, something that Yuan noticed immediately.

"You're willing to allow him to suffer for your own stubbornness…" He was always sharp like this, never missing a beat when it came to defeating an enemy, though crushing seemed a better term.

I glared at him. "Yuan…" I growled out.

He stared at me head on and I suddenly felt nervous. Was my stubbornness really about to possibly get my son and me killed?

"I never wanted it to come to this Kratos…" he said, saying my name for the first time since we started this conversation. The internal conflict that turned within his eyes was redirected at me.

I glared hard at him, "Then why are you allowing it to be so?" I growled out.

He glared back at me, standing up and shouting. "You know why!"

I stood as well, shouting, "Is it so easy for you to condemn me to death!"

He looked shocked for a moment before glaring at me darkly. "HOW.DARE.YOU." He growled out.

I glared back just as darkly, "You seem so swift with your sword to cut off your enemies head without hesitation, it is no wonder you are able to do so to what you once called allies, you have already condemned Mithos and Martel!"

Yuan's eyes widened at the mention of Martel's name. "I-I didn't…" He said suddenly stuttering.

"Mithos is trying to bring her back, yet you seem to resist such a notion." I said without giving him a chance to recover.

He glared at me. "She is already dead." He said monotone, though I knew by his eyes he was suffering deeply just by the mention of her name. "As is Anna, as will be your son, and all other people should you choose to continue to follow Yggdrasill."

I glared at him darkly, "Do not say her name…" I ground out.

He smiled, though it was not a smile of joy of any description. "She is dead, you killed her…as I did Martel, though I more so allow her to remain dead." He looked at me, "We can not change that..."

I had had enough of him, and I walked over to and slapped him across the face. "You condemn those who are alive, and dishonour those who have passed on!" I growled at him.

He stared up at me shocked, and then tenderly touched his cheek. "Kratos…" His eyes… there was so much hurt there.

I felt terrible, but I could not hear him speak of Anna so…loosely.

He closed his eyes and willed away his hurt, standing up to face me once again. "Kratos…why do you follow the one who ordered your wife's death?" He asked me.

I felt the need to strike him come forth again, but willed it away.

He continued though he knew at any moment I would attack again. "He is the one who ordered her death, he is the one who orders you to kill your son, who you had thought you had lost." He looked at me with eyes of pity, knowing what he was saying was hitting home. "Your son may very well die by your hand." He stopped and looked at me for some sort of reaction, when seeing what he desired he continued, "or if not perhaps by Yggdrasill's."

I couldn't stand it, and I went to strike again, when he caught my arm, and pulled himself closer. "Kratos, he will die…and you will be forced to live on in eternity knowing that it was you that caused it."

I silently seethed. Yuan was driving what little will I had not to beat him senseless away. "Yuan." I said through grit teeth. "Stop or I will hurt you…"

"No Kratos…I will make you see sense." He said calmly back.

I snapped again, and struggled within his grasp, finally getting the upper hand, and pushing him down on his desk. He cried out in pain as he was held down on the desk with myself on top of him. He looked up at me, glaring darkly again.

I glared back down at him, suddenly aware as to how close we were. "Yuan, I told you to stop…"

"And I told you I wouldn't till you saw reason." He replied, grunting slightly at the heavy weight on him.

I pressed my weight harder down upon him. I could hear his ribs creak, staining not to break. I also saw him wince in pain. "Yuan, I will not be swayed by your tongue, nor will I allow you to kill Lloyd or Mithos."

"Kratos, sooner or later you are going to have to choose who you save and who you betray." Yuan said glaring at me.

"…When that times comes I will make my choice and no sooner." I replied.

"By that time it will be to late…" He said, "You must choose soon, if not now…"

I growled and pushed harder down upon him, and he gave a cry of pain. "Yuan…you will not tell me how to run my life…"

"I never wanted too…I just wanted you to able to make that choice yourself." He wheezed out, clearly in pain.

Time stopped for a moment…my eyes grew wide, and for the first time, it was not in anger or pain, but shock. "How…could you continue to care…?" I asked. It was now so hard to breath…

"Kratos, I have always cared about you…and that won't stop simply because we are fighting…" Yuan said turning kind eyes to me. "Please…allow me to help you…"

I could feel my heart beat racing, and the blood rushing to my head.

I felt Yuan's arms wrap around me as I tried to catch my breath. "Kratos…" He murmured, wrapping me somewhat in a hug.

I closed my eyes laying completely on him, face lightly flushed and trying to get my heart back to it's normal beat.

(Okay about now the fangirl inside me is squealing like a little idiot.)

Yuan shifted under me, making me aware that I was indeed squishing him. I got up off of him and we had a long look at each other.

"Yuan…" I started, but he put his finger up to my lips.

"It's okay… I wasn't being nice…" He said smiling.

I had a sudden urge to kiss that finger, and before I knew what I was doing I was doing so…

(And now she had been going into nosebleeds. I also realised this story wasn't very yaoi till about now…)

Yuan blinked in surprise, but not removing his fingers. I took that hand into my own and examined it with my eyes, before kissing it again, and then sucking on it lightly.

Yuan's eyes glazed over. Kratos stared into those eyes that held so many emotions; I had however never seen this emotion, at least never directed towards me.

((You want the rest of the lemon you'll have to go on to http/adultfan. after we had completed our love we sat and basked in the after glow. Smiling, I looked to him. He had passed out and was sleeping peacefully beside me. Feeling a deep peace within my heart that I had not felt in a long time, I gathered him in my arms and help him. I kissed his forehead again and whispered those words I had felt and said during our lovemaking.

Though tomorrow I knew we would have to face a very painful decision, for this moment I was content to forget about Mithos, the eternal sword, and everything else.

Just to be happy for this one moment…I know it sounds sappy, but it's all I had at this moment.

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And end!

Ya, so this is my first time writing a lemony, story. So please do not hate me for it!

Anyways I hope you enjoyed this story and that it made sense


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